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Newsletter Archive |
November,
2008 - Hurdling the Barriers
Here's how to
overcome some of the most common barriers to successful mediation.
.
....Click
HERE for more.
October,
2008 - A Fair Negotiation
Negotiation skills will help you achieve some of your needs and wants
without alienating or angering the other parties involved. Here's how to
use negotiation to resolve disputes and to build better interpersonal
relationships. ....Click
HERE for more.
September, 2008 -
The Most Common
Questions Asked About Divorce Mediation
1. Why use mediation?
2. At what point should you use mediation?
3. How much does mediation cost?
Click HERE for more.
August,
2008 - Can You Have a Mediated Divorce If You Are Angry At Your Spouse?
Anger is a
normal feeling to have during a divorce. In fact, if you didn’t feel
angry there would probably be something very wrong. Usually, one person
has been unhappy for a period of time preceding the divorce, and was
angry during this time. Anger can be expressed in mediation
and in fact, it is a valuable tool for a mediator to use to not only
resolve the divorce, but also to help shape a better....Click
HERE for more.
July,
2008 - Is Mediation for You?
The mediation process, also
called Alternative Dispute Resolution (ADR), requires two individuals
who are willing to look past their emotions and, in a spirit of
cooperation, find the best solution for their unique situation.
Mediation is not a magic pill -- it can't turn a terrible situation into
a good one -- but it can help to create a future everyone can live with.
Click HERE for more.
June,
2008 - Fighting Words
When your ex makes you
"fighting mad," it can be hard to resist the impulse to engage in verbal
battle. But a fight just leads to a revenge attack, and then another and
another. Here's how to get out of this vicious circle and resolve your
dispute.
Click HERE for more.
May,
2008 - Dealing with Complaints
When your children complain
about their other parent, you may be tempted to come out swinging. Your
impulse to fight for your children can make you say and do things that
you may later regret. Here are a few strategies to help confused parents
make sensible decisions when children complain about their dad or mom.
Click HERE for more.
April,
2008 - Coming to Grips With the Financial Fear Factor
If you are in the process of
dissolving a marriage, you are painfully aware of the horrendous stress
divorce places on everyone involved. From the state’s point of view, the
process is essentially legal and financial. But from your perspective,
divorce is a personal tragedy........
Click HERE for more.
March, 2008 -
Who Started It Doesn’t
Necessarily Matter!
Remember in the Wizard
of Oz, when Dorothy began her stroll down the Yellow Brick Road?
Eventually she came upon a fork in the road. There she stood, unable to
determine which way to go until the voice of the Scarecrow came from
behind. With arms folded one over the other and fingers pointing out in
opposite directions, he said, “some folks go that way (pointing in one
direction), and others go that way (pointing in the other direction).”
Sitting between parents in a high conflict situation with regard to
custody and access issues is like watching the scarecrow. However, with
separated parents they are both pointing at each other, each blaming the
other.....
Click HERE for more.
February,
2008 -
The
Appropriate Divorce Model
Experience
and research has helped us identify some of the basic
elements of a successful and healthy divorce. The term
"successful and healthy" as used here, means completing the
divorce process of emotional separation, achieving a new
center of balance as a single person and single parent,
maintaining the best interest and welfare of your children,
and establishing positive and healthy new attitudes toward
yourself, your ex-spouse, and your prior marriage.......Click
HERE for more.
January,
2008 - How To Take Conflict Out Of
Divorce
It's
possible to divorce in a way that supports the well-being of
everyone. You can end the conflict, heal the hurt and part
as friends. You just need to learn how.
Unfortunately, most divorces are
handled in a very different way. Sides get drawn and issues
become something to fight over rather than something to
resolve. Walls of protection get fortified and distance
grows......Click
HERE for more.
December 2007 - Is Mediation for You?
The mediation process, also called Alternative
Dispute Resolution (ADR), requires two individuals who are willing to
look past their emotions and, in a spirit of cooperation, find the best
solution for their unique situation. Mediation is not a magic pill -- it
can't turn a terrible situation into a good one -- but it can help to
create a future everyone can live with.....
Click HERE for more.
November, 2007
-
10 Common Mistakes and Oversights in Divorce
Agreements (Related to the Children)
As a divorce mediator in private
practice, I also see couples coming back for post-divorce
mediation. Often, what brings them back are errors,
omissions and oversights in their original divorce
agreements. Click
HERE for more.
October, 2007
- The
Money Trap
Two nice
people who used to be a nice couple not too long ago are
suddenly being cheered on like two gladiators trying to
destroy one another. The "Greek chorus" of well-wishers
sometimes gives bad advice.......Click
HERE for more.
September, 2007
- The Perfect Divorce
Your family is going to look different after divorce, but
that doesn't have to be a bad thing. Here are ten steps to
help you re-create your family as a happy, functional,
two-home family post-divorce......Click
HERE for more.
August, 2007
-
Step by Step
Parenting
is a pretty tough job, but step parenting can be even
harder. What are your roles and responsibilities? How does
it compare with parenting your biological children? And what
happens to step-relationships when the stepfamily breaks up?
Here are some tips on these issues......Click
HERE for more.
July, 2007
- The Parental Grip
The biggest challenge is to be your children’s rock during a
time when you feel like you are about to lose your mind.
During the transition, your kids are dealing with their own
issues and emotions. There is definitely pain and loss for
children; they will need time to grieve and experience their
pain before moving on. As their parent, you need to give
your children.....Click
HERE for more.
June, 2007
-
"How to Reconcile Your Emotions With the Financial Side of
Your Divorce"
How do
you deal with money when you are so involved emotionally
with your spouse? That is the central question you must
answer for yourself, and that is what we will help you do
throughout this article, because the better you manage your
emotions, the better you will be able to manage your money
during divorce.
.....Click
HERE for more.
May, 2007
-
The Good Divorce
The "good
divorce" is not an oxymoron. The simple truth is that while
there are bad divorces, there are also good ones. And it's
never too late to have a good divorce......Click
HERE for more.
April, 2007
- Mom's House, Dad's House
If you ask their opinion, children will almost always choose
a two-parent, two-home alternative over a one-home
arrangement with the other parent as a visitor or -- worse
yet -- gone from the scene entirely. Here's how to meet the
challenges of setting up two happy homes for your children.....Click
HERE for more.
March, 2007
- Which Financial Professional Is The Right One To Use In
Divorce?
Traditionally, financial planners work with individuals at
the conclusion of the legal process. However, financial
planners with additional training in the financial, tax, and
emotional issues of divorce (Certified Divorce Financial
Analysts - CDFA) can be extremely valuable during the
divorce process......Click
HERE for more.
February,
2007 -
Learning to
live apart
Separation
is an important stage of the divorce process. This waiting
period can be the perfect thing to calm your nerves and give
you needed clarity. During this time, you must "cut the
cord" to bring about a state of closure, because it's only
with closure that you can begin a new life.......Click
HERE for more.
January,
2007 - Divorce Mediation Leads to a Lasting Resolution
The
positive and transforming effects of mediation can have a
lasting effect beyond the context of the dispute at hand.
The beneficiaries of the mediation process are not always
limited to the disputing parties. This is because most
disputes do not exist in a semi-vacuum inhabited only by the
disputing parties. There are family members, neighbors, and
co-workers who may all be affected by the dispute, and who
may experience a change, sometimes a profound change in
their own lives when a dispute is resolved in mediation......Click
HERE for more.
December,
2006 - Effects of Divorce on Children
In the last few years, higher-quality research which has allowed the
"meta-analysis" of previously published research has shown the negative
effects of divorce on children have been greatly exaggerated.
Researchers now view conflict, rather than the divorce or residential
schedule, as the single most critical determining factor in children's
post-divorce adjustment. The children who succeed after divorce have
parents who can communicate effectively and work together as parents.....Click
HERE for more.
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