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How it Works |
Let us not look back in anger or
forward in fear, but around in awareness.
--- James Thurber
At Carolina Divorce Mediators,
we encourage you to contact our office by telephone so that you may talk
to our mediator and learn more about the process first hand. We
will be glad to explain the process in its entirety and entertain any
questions that you have.
At the time the first session is scheduled, contact information will be
requested so we may send a pre-mediation documentation packet to you.
This packet contains items such as
Key Issues of Discussion
– a general list of subject areas that are usually discussed in the
mediation process,
Financial Information
You Might Need – a helpful checklist of financial items that you may wish to gather,
a Financial Affidavit and a Lifestyle Analysis.
There is also
a
Personal Belongings Worksheet
that you
may use to help discern who will get what household items such as
furniture, electronics, and other items. You may even wish to review our
Parenting Models for
suggestions on how to effectively spend time with your children. Having this packet in hand prior
to the first meeting affords you the opportunity to consider in advance
many of the topics of our discussions as well as help you prepare the
necessary information that will be needed. Most couples remain very
productive during the mediations when equipped with the information that
they need to make informed decisions.
In order to be flexible,
we have two offices in the Charlotte area. One is conveniently
located in the SouthPark area and the other at Lake Norman. This permits mediations during a normal work day
with minimal client travel time.
We typically schedule
in 3-4 hour blocks.
Since you are
building agreements throughout the process, using shorter sessions
can cut your momentum short and sessions longer than 4 hours tend to
cause "burn-out" with your ability to remain focused diminishing with
time.
Our "morning block" typically runs from 8:30 a.m. until 12:30 p.m. and
our "afternoon block" runs from 1:00 p.m. until 5:00 p.m. We
realize that different clients have different needs when it comes to
scheduling and we are certainly willing to work with you to set a
schedule that permits effective mediation even in the most hectic of
schedules.
The first topic
of discussion is usually your children. If you have no children or
if they are grown, we step right into the discussion of assets, liabilities,
and support. Your mediator
will facilitate your discussion on a variety of topics, keeping you focused on the issues
and looking for
common ground for settlement. Each of your perspectives will be
heard and the process will be kept moving in a positive, productive manner.
Various solutions will be explored so that the best possible agreement may
be reached. Agreements that meet everyone's needs provide the most
satisfying results and we are there to help you accomplish that goal.
Crafting a
workable, comprehensive parenting agreement is essential to the well-being
of your children. We will address items such as how and when the
children spend time with you, health insurance, school and religious
issues, extra-curricular activities, and child support. We can also
discuss any issues on how you will conduct yourselves -- after you have
separated -- while in the
presence of your children.
An equitable,
practical distribution of assets and liabilities is also a part of our
process. Making informed decisions is imperative to insure that your
financial future is secure. We can even provide resources to help
you navigate the more complex issues such as pension and business
valuations and the tax implications of any proposed settlements.
Each decision
builds on the previous and a spirit of cooperation is established between
the two of you.
 Congratulations! You have
finished all discussions. At this point, we create a summary of your
agreed upon items known as a
Memorandum of Understanding.
Once completed, you may review the Memorandum and we will be happy to make
any changes or clarifications. Although it is very thorough and precise, this document is not in itself
legally binding. The Memorandum should
then be taken to an attorney of your choice (we can refer you to our
partner attorney) so that a legal document
called a Separation Agreement may be drawn up. Once you sign your
Separation Agreement, it is legal and binding.
Lastly, each of you
should make sure that you have been properly advised by your own legal
professional or attorney and a financial consultant prior to making and
signing any irrevocable agreements. These professionals will look
out for your interests and can offer any advice on the ramifications of
any decisions that you are proposing.
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